Does your quote have to be something smart, or can it be something you live by? –Kathy Kuzni
Answer: Both. Enjoy!
QUOTES FROM THE STUDENTS
Fried unborn child flesh… it’s like chicharrones only crunchier. –Corwin Johnson
A rock praised God. –David Sommers
I wanted to be a fire truck. –Matt Black
If you are bold enough to open your legs, you deserve to have another child. –Pendeka Nimmer
There are not teachers, there are people. –Bethany Mueller
I’m going to be a lady who wakes up and throws things at people. –Monica Lim
You could put poo on here. –Monica Lim
Spencer, can you move so I can clean up your MISTAKES?! –Brittany Poon
I’m not WASHING it, I’m WASHING it! –Spencer Huey
My friends a raw-foodist. Heee… only eats… raw food. –Nick Chavez
I can’t know if I don’t know! –Brittany Poon
Nooo! I was out-reiterating-line-did! –Nick Chavez
Do unto others as you are to do to them. –Brittany Poon
I’m so abused. We should make a movie- The Abused. –Brittany Poon
I’m the black boy! –Brittany Poon
Penguin! Penguin! I ride my penguin! –Spencer Huey
Ugh… he’s gunna make us read from the nasty packet… -Jessica Strom
It’s like wearing a sweatshirt while trying to touch her head to her butt. –Nick Chavez
C’mon, Beth- be a real princess! Spin on your butt! –Kim Bicker
That’s a question mark and an exclamation point RIGHT next to each other! Are you READY FOR THAT?! –Cory Johnson
Wait, how are you supposed to eat with teeth? –Spencer Huey
My face would stop a bullet. –Bethany Mueller
Leave my lip gloss alone! –Ryan Campos
Stop tugging on my garment! –Mark Phillips
Nazis are cool, anyways! –Mark Phillips
It smelled like a sewer. Not even a good one. –Nick Chavez
Kimberly wants CORY?! What?! –Nick Chavez
You have, like, my dream pantry. –Christine Chia
My people eat people! Augh! –Tiffany Fakava
We were long lost England ring sisters, isn’t that cool? –Kim Bicker
We take them and put them in labor camps, we take their children and re-educate them. –Cory Johnson
Now I know massive genocide SOUNDS bad… but not necessarily. –Cory Johnson
You know why communism didn’t work? Because Stalin was WEAK! –Cory Johnson
My fish gets really lethargic recently, ‘cause it’s so hot. –Chelsea Price
Cows produce themselves. –Kathy Kuzni
(To the tune of Hey, Jude) Heyyy cowww! Don’t make it baaad! Take a sad sooong, and get your head chopped off! –Kathy Kuzni
It could seep through the skin of your teeth… wait… -Mark Phillips
Okay, I can prove to you that Santa is a ninja. He has a secret lair that no one can find, he has thousands of gnomes to do his bidding, and he gets around the world and delivers to every child… without being seen. –Matt Black (from Ask a Ninja)
Nicky, this is the music I made you to! –Matt Black
Well, I know you guys are fat, but be happy. –Austin Foxworthy
The hairier the better. –Spencer Huey
It’s like you have a hole in your mouth that leads straight to your digestive tract! –Ryan Campos
Furry Harry? HAHAHAHAHA! That’s redundant! –Matt Black
A man can smile and smile and still be a villain! –Cory Johnson
How do you spell lizard? Because I’ve been using two z’s like every time! –Cory Johnson
I get really tense and then I want to hurt people. –Bethany Mueller
Uhm… I think it might die without it’s butt… -Nick Chavez
You bought all the navels? –Nick Chavez
Will you come to college with me, Mr. Gillette? –Kathy Kuzni
I need to make my Satan playlist… I’m serious! –Jessica Strom
No, actually, I’m wearing myself. –Mark Phillips
Bethany got her salami in my orange soda! –Nick Chavez
Can we sing to Katrina? –Spencer (on Jenny’s birthday)
NO! NO! You can’t! I’m Indiana Jones! –Bethany Mueller
I’m a firm believer in “skadooshism.” I am a shadooshist. I believe in all things centered on and abiding to the skadoosh. –Nick Chavez
Every once and a while I wish I had a rocket launcher. –Robert Meninga
There were Indian people touching my head the whole time, and they spilled popcorn and it got in my pants. –Matt Black
Beastiality runs in my family. –Nick Chavez
You don’t understand the joys of cheese. –Christine Chia
(talking about cheese) It’s like the creation of man! –Bethany Mueller
(to Cory) You still have roses on your fingers- you’re gay. –Jessica Strom
“Credit problem! NO problem! (On approved credit)”
[a poem that nick found...]
“I once had a cat named Patty
And everyone called her fatty
She ate tuna and pie
And lots of sandwiches on rye
And she lay on the floor like a matty.”
QUOTES FROM THE TEACHERS
I'm not a nice person when I haven’t. –Mrs. Magee
Maybe you have to taste dope in order for it to taste good? –Mrs. Magee
If you don’t learn anything in my class, you should learn to recycle. –Mr. Sugimura
What do you put in compost bins? Dead food. –Mr. Sugimura
If you never heard about sex by now, it’s too late for you. –Mrs. Magee
Get that naked textbook out of my sight, it’s offending me. –Mr. Gillette
Don’t read your Bibles in here. –Mr. Suigmura
He was shitting on the shepherds. –Mrs. Magee (She meant sitting)
(After Ryan Campos hit her behind) Oh! Well, that was exciting. I don’t get many thrills in my life, Ryan, but… -Mrs. Magee
You dipped him in sexy, sticky water. –Mrs. Magee
You have no energy because you’ve been in the bedroom all day. –Mrs. Magee
Everyone is dead in this area. –Mrs. Magee
Every year my goal is to steal at least five babies. –Mr. Edington
Trust me, I’m very good at stealing babies. –Mr. Edington
I know you made fun of Kansas, which is easy to do. –Mrs. Magee
Ooo, Redwood Christian vs. Chinese Christian. I might go see that game. Go Rams! –Mr. Sugimura
That one was a barn burner. –Mr. Gillette
Some people in the church come in to fleece the flock. –Mr. Gillette
We should or we shant. –Mr. Gillette
Don’t tell yo mama, I’m voting for Obama. –Mr. Gillette
When I was 28, Santa Claus died, so we hired a new one. –Mr. Hearne
Puss, puss filled fluid. –Mrs. Magee
Fortunately weasels do suck eggs. –Mrs. Magee
No, I actually had beard lice. –Mr. Russell
We’re obviously getting into more modern art here- Picasso crap. –Mr. Hendren
I feel like we’re back in the sixties and everyone is on acid going like this *snaps fingers with a dazed look on his face* -Mr. Edington
Campos, you’re Latin, you drink. –Mr. Hendren
Calm down there, Frisky. –Mr. Hendren
I only had one friend and that was the puppet that lived in my closet, Ralphy. –Mr. Russell
I have an entire room dedicated to Theo Huxtable. –Mr. Russell
My puppet at home always knew what to say. He was So Raven. –Mr. Russell
She went to Lucky! Who knows what kind of food I have now? It’s Lucky! You’re lucky if the food isn’t crap!!! –Mr. Hendren
Babies are useless to men. –Mr. Hendren
Jesus overturned the money changers. –Mr. Edington
It’s like the stork comes, and it was under lettuce- that’s what I was taught. –Mr. Edington
Oh, that’s right, you were snoozing. Somewhere between reality and unreality, I gave you a purple sheet. –Mrs. Magee
What, do you have to butter yourself down to get that thing off? –Mr. Russell (on Nathaniel’s tight fitting shirt)
Except my middle name is 24 letters. My actual name is Kurtlertellusnesswooskii. –Mr. Russell
My parents never come to my house and say “Eat your lima beans, dang it!” That never happens! –Mr. Duenes
I can’t change the gayness of Renweb. –Mr. Duenes
Don’t any of you clean out your ears? Feels great! –Mr. Duenes
I have the vision of a hawk. –Mr. Hendren
There will be no taking illegal steroids… but I won’t be looking… -Mrs. Magee
If it’s at a 45 degree angle, you can watch Spencer die. –Mr. Sugimura
Please do not gender dress. –Mrs. Magee
It was a good book… it had some cuss words in it. –Mr. Duenes
I see a lotta people not lookin’, so I don’t know if I’m scratchin’ people where they itch or not. –Mr Gillette
You know what that means? Until you walk down the isle and tilt your little hat one way or the other, you’re under my control! –Mr. Russell
Remind me to tell you this before Senior Trip, ‘cause I’ll probably flsh- and then I get really happy. It dunno what it is, maybe it’s the drugs… no, I’m just kidding. –Mrs. Magee
There will be no singing in this class. This is a place of doom, gloom, and debt. –Mr. Gillette.
Two and a half cows make a computer. –Mr. Gillette
If they put gay marriage or something like heterosexual marriage, I’ll take it. –Mr. Edington
We’re going to put my retarded baby pictures up there with your name on ‘em, ‘cause I was one of those metrosexual babies… you could not tell. –Mrs. Magee
We’ll give you Russell’s picture… baby with a beard. –Mrs. Magee
So stay in your rooms after curfew, we’ll check. The men will go to the men’s room- the women will go to the men’s room… -Mrs. Magee
Here’s the United Staaates… (drawing) Hey! The United States is lookin’ pretty good today! –Mr. Gillette
Mr. Magee could play basketball there, so if he could play there it must not be a good school. –Mr. Russell
C’mon, Matt, relax! Argue with me! –Mr. Russell
If economics is my meat and potatoes, than track is my dessert. Thank you for sharing dessert with me. –Mr. Gillette
If you were raised on an island with no clothes and no razors you would be a big naked furball and you would think it was beautiful to see a naked hairy woman and you would be together and make furballs. –Mrs. Magee
Let’s not be dissing one another. –Mr. Gillette
(Being “sneaky” during a game of Risk) We’re moving to Mongolia so we can shepard our sheep. That’s allll we wanna do. –Mr. Hendren
I don’t drink liquor. I do, however, lick fuzzy navels. –Mrs. Magee
Never listen to a woman. –Mrs. Magee
Fuzzy navels make the best lollipops. –Mrs. Magee
You know, I have a thing with fuzz. –Mrs. Magee
I’ll wear anything as long as it’s not tooo gay. –Mr. Wilcox
The bell is a sound for a holy hush to descend upon the classroom. –Mr. Gillette
Did you guys see the Aladdin thing? It was magical. –Mr. Gillette
I don’t believe in rolling, it’s against my religion. –Mr. Hendren
CONVERSATIONS
QUOTES FROM THE STUDENTS
Fried unborn child flesh… it’s like chicharrones only crunchier. –Corwin Johnson
A rock praised God. –David Sommers
I wanted to be a fire truck. –Matt Black
If you are bold enough to open your legs, you deserve to have another child. –Pendeka Nimmer
There are not teachers, there are people. –Bethany Mueller
I’m going to be a lady who wakes up and throws things at people. –Monica Lim
You could put poo on here. –Monica Lim
Spencer, can you move so I can clean up your MISTAKES?! –Brittany Poon
I’m not WASHING it, I’m WASHING it! –Spencer Huey
My friends a raw-foodist. Heee… only eats… raw food. –Nick Chavez
I can’t know if I don’t know! –Brittany Poon
Nooo! I was out-reiterating-line-did! –Nick Chavez
Do unto others as you are to do to them. –Brittany Poon
I’m so abused. We should make a movie- The Abused. –Brittany Poon
I’m the black boy! –Brittany Poon
Penguin! Penguin! I ride my penguin! –Spencer Huey
Ugh… he’s gunna make us read from the nasty packet… -Jessica Strom
It’s like wearing a sweatshirt while trying to touch her head to her butt. –Nick Chavez
C’mon, Beth- be a real princess! Spin on your butt! –Kim Bicker
That’s a question mark and an exclamation point RIGHT next to each other! Are you READY FOR THAT?! –Cory Johnson
Wait, how are you supposed to eat with teeth? –Spencer Huey
My face would stop a bullet. –Bethany Mueller
Leave my lip gloss alone! –Ryan Campos
Stop tugging on my garment! –Mark Phillips
Nazis are cool, anyways! –Mark Phillips
It smelled like a sewer. Not even a good one. –Nick Chavez
Kimberly wants CORY?! What?! –Nick Chavez
You have, like, my dream pantry. –Christine Chia
My people eat people! Augh! –Tiffany Fakava
We were long lost England ring sisters, isn’t that cool? –Kim Bicker
We take them and put them in labor camps, we take their children and re-educate them. –Cory Johnson
Now I know massive genocide SOUNDS bad… but not necessarily. –Cory Johnson
You know why communism didn’t work? Because Stalin was WEAK! –Cory Johnson
My fish gets really lethargic recently, ‘cause it’s so hot. –Chelsea Price
Cows produce themselves. –Kathy Kuzni
(To the tune of Hey, Jude) Heyyy cowww! Don’t make it baaad! Take a sad sooong, and get your head chopped off! –Kathy Kuzni
It could seep through the skin of your teeth… wait… -Mark Phillips
Okay, I can prove to you that Santa is a ninja. He has a secret lair that no one can find, he has thousands of gnomes to do his bidding, and he gets around the world and delivers to every child… without being seen. –Matt Black (from Ask a Ninja)
Nicky, this is the music I made you to! –Matt Black
Well, I know you guys are fat, but be happy. –Austin Foxworthy
The hairier the better. –Spencer Huey
It’s like you have a hole in your mouth that leads straight to your digestive tract! –Ryan Campos
Furry Harry? HAHAHAHAHA! That’s redundant! –Matt Black
A man can smile and smile and still be a villain! –Cory Johnson
How do you spell lizard? Because I’ve been using two z’s like every time! –Cory Johnson
I get really tense and then I want to hurt people. –Bethany Mueller
Uhm… I think it might die without it’s butt… -Nick Chavez
You bought all the navels? –Nick Chavez
Will you come to college with me, Mr. Gillette? –Kathy Kuzni
I need to make my Satan playlist… I’m serious! –Jessica Strom
No, actually, I’m wearing myself. –Mark Phillips
Bethany got her salami in my orange soda! –Nick Chavez
Can we sing to Katrina? –Spencer (on Jenny’s birthday)
NO! NO! You can’t! I’m Indiana Jones! –Bethany Mueller
I’m a firm believer in “skadooshism.” I am a shadooshist. I believe in all things centered on and abiding to the skadoosh. –Nick Chavez
Every once and a while I wish I had a rocket launcher. –Robert Meninga
There were Indian people touching my head the whole time, and they spilled popcorn and it got in my pants. –Matt Black
Beastiality runs in my family. –Nick Chavez
You don’t understand the joys of cheese. –Christine Chia
(talking about cheese) It’s like the creation of man! –Bethany Mueller
(to Cory) You still have roses on your fingers- you’re gay. –Jessica Strom
“Credit problem! NO problem! (On approved credit)”
[a poem that nick found...]
“I once had a cat named Patty
And everyone called her fatty
She ate tuna and pie
And lots of sandwiches on rye
And she lay on the floor like a matty.”
QUOTES FROM THE TEACHERS
I'm not a nice person when I haven’t. –Mrs. Magee
Maybe you have to taste dope in order for it to taste good? –Mrs. Magee
If you don’t learn anything in my class, you should learn to recycle. –Mr. Sugimura
What do you put in compost bins? Dead food. –Mr. Sugimura
If you never heard about sex by now, it’s too late for you. –Mrs. Magee
Get that naked textbook out of my sight, it’s offending me. –Mr. Gillette
Don’t read your Bibles in here. –Mr. Suigmura
He was shitting on the shepherds. –Mrs. Magee (She meant sitting)
(After Ryan Campos hit her behind) Oh! Well, that was exciting. I don’t get many thrills in my life, Ryan, but… -Mrs. Magee
You dipped him in sexy, sticky water. –Mrs. Magee
You have no energy because you’ve been in the bedroom all day. –Mrs. Magee
Everyone is dead in this area. –Mrs. Magee
Every year my goal is to steal at least five babies. –Mr. Edington
Trust me, I’m very good at stealing babies. –Mr. Edington
I know you made fun of Kansas, which is easy to do. –Mrs. Magee
Ooo, Redwood Christian vs. Chinese Christian. I might go see that game. Go Rams! –Mr. Sugimura
That one was a barn burner. –Mr. Gillette
Some people in the church come in to fleece the flock. –Mr. Gillette
We should or we shant. –Mr. Gillette
Don’t tell yo mama, I’m voting for Obama. –Mr. Gillette
When I was 28, Santa Claus died, so we hired a new one. –Mr. Hearne
Puss, puss filled fluid. –Mrs. Magee
Fortunately weasels do suck eggs. –Mrs. Magee
No, I actually had beard lice. –Mr. Russell
We’re obviously getting into more modern art here- Picasso crap. –Mr. Hendren
I feel like we’re back in the sixties and everyone is on acid going like this *snaps fingers with a dazed look on his face* -Mr. Edington
Campos, you’re Latin, you drink. –Mr. Hendren
Calm down there, Frisky. –Mr. Hendren
I only had one friend and that was the puppet that lived in my closet, Ralphy. –Mr. Russell
I have an entire room dedicated to Theo Huxtable. –Mr. Russell
My puppet at home always knew what to say. He was So Raven. –Mr. Russell
She went to Lucky! Who knows what kind of food I have now? It’s Lucky! You’re lucky if the food isn’t crap!!! –Mr. Hendren
Babies are useless to men. –Mr. Hendren
Jesus overturned the money changers. –Mr. Edington
It’s like the stork comes, and it was under lettuce- that’s what I was taught. –Mr. Edington
Oh, that’s right, you were snoozing. Somewhere between reality and unreality, I gave you a purple sheet. –Mrs. Magee
What, do you have to butter yourself down to get that thing off? –Mr. Russell (on Nathaniel’s tight fitting shirt)
Except my middle name is 24 letters. My actual name is Kurtlertellusnesswooskii. –Mr. Russell
My parents never come to my house and say “Eat your lima beans, dang it!” That never happens! –Mr. Duenes
I can’t change the gayness of Renweb. –Mr. Duenes
Don’t any of you clean out your ears? Feels great! –Mr. Duenes
I have the vision of a hawk. –Mr. Hendren
There will be no taking illegal steroids… but I won’t be looking… -Mrs. Magee
If it’s at a 45 degree angle, you can watch Spencer die. –Mr. Sugimura
Please do not gender dress. –Mrs. Magee
It was a good book… it had some cuss words in it. –Mr. Duenes
I see a lotta people not lookin’, so I don’t know if I’m scratchin’ people where they itch or not. –Mr Gillette
You know what that means? Until you walk down the isle and tilt your little hat one way or the other, you’re under my control! –Mr. Russell
Remind me to tell you this before Senior Trip, ‘cause I’ll probably flsh- and then I get really happy. It dunno what it is, maybe it’s the drugs… no, I’m just kidding. –Mrs. Magee
There will be no singing in this class. This is a place of doom, gloom, and debt. –Mr. Gillette.
Two and a half cows make a computer. –Mr. Gillette
If they put gay marriage or something like heterosexual marriage, I’ll take it. –Mr. Edington
We’re going to put my retarded baby pictures up there with your name on ‘em, ‘cause I was one of those metrosexual babies… you could not tell. –Mrs. Magee
We’ll give you Russell’s picture… baby with a beard. –Mrs. Magee
So stay in your rooms after curfew, we’ll check. The men will go to the men’s room- the women will go to the men’s room… -Mrs. Magee
Here’s the United Staaates… (drawing) Hey! The United States is lookin’ pretty good today! –Mr. Gillette
Mr. Magee could play basketball there, so if he could play there it must not be a good school. –Mr. Russell
C’mon, Matt, relax! Argue with me! –Mr. Russell
If economics is my meat and potatoes, than track is my dessert. Thank you for sharing dessert with me. –Mr. Gillette
If you were raised on an island with no clothes and no razors you would be a big naked furball and you would think it was beautiful to see a naked hairy woman and you would be together and make furballs. –Mrs. Magee
Let’s not be dissing one another. –Mr. Gillette
(Being “sneaky” during a game of Risk) We’re moving to Mongolia so we can shepard our sheep. That’s allll we wanna do. –Mr. Hendren
I don’t drink liquor. I do, however, lick fuzzy navels. –Mrs. Magee
Never listen to a woman. –Mrs. Magee
Fuzzy navels make the best lollipops. –Mrs. Magee
You know, I have a thing with fuzz. –Mrs. Magee
I’ll wear anything as long as it’s not tooo gay. –Mr. Wilcox
The bell is a sound for a holy hush to descend upon the classroom. –Mr. Gillette
Did you guys see the Aladdin thing? It was magical. –Mr. Gillette
I don’t believe in rolling, it’s against my religion. –Mr. Hendren
CONVERSATIONS
Jenny: Ryan, don't eat arms.
Ryan Campos: Yes... I have a problem...
Mr. Edington: Knock it off, or I'll make it into an essay
Matt Black: Bring it on, old man!
[playing RISK]
Ryan Campos: I need you.
Mark: Ryan, I need you to fulfill your vows.
Mr. Gillette: What is crucial to national defense?
David Gora: ... clothes...?
Mr. Gillette: Yes, well... we don't want our soldiers fighting naked!
Bethany: Why does it say "flowers" on your jersey?
Matt Black: Because our team was "Remember the Flowers."
Mr. Russell: I just told you that if you got me fired I would punch you in the kidneys.
Nathaniel: And hijack my car.
Mr. Russell: Yeah, and punch you in the kidneys... with my transmission
Erin: What can you put in a cup but can't take out?
Mike McNew: A soul.
Amanda Chinn: Why do you want a girl's hair tie?
Ryan Campos: For my lovely locks.
Bethany: Peanuts and apple juice.
Mr. Russell: That was a staple at the Russell home
Daniel: Why don't you do something fun, like look at rents on houses?
Mr. Hendren: No... that's not fun anymore.
Mr. Duenes: Why would you get on a train to Chicago if you don't wanna go to Chicago?
Cory: For the riiide!
Mr. Hendren: Don't go on any website they wouldn't approve of!
TA: Go on myspace.
Mr. Hendren: Don't do that, it's like calling the devil!!!
Mark: Just in case something cogs... conks... yeah.
Mr. Hendren: You need to lay off the wine, my friend.
Ryan Campos: You have no soul.
Mr. Hendren: I do, you just have to look really hard.
Mr. Hendren (throwing grapes at Ryan): It's like feeding ducks!
[Ryan angrily throws grapes back at Hendren, Hendren looses one grape]
Mr. Hendren: You'll be sorry when that starts to smell!
Tim V: It might ferment.
Mr. Hendren: Ooooo...
Mr. Hendren: Look what I eat! It's healthy.
Ethan: Yeah, after every apple you eat two Dr. Peppers
Mr. Hendren: No! Only one.
Daniel: I don't think you were supposed to read that out loud.
Mr. Hendren: But it was red and had little things...
Daniel: Exclamation points?
Mr. Hendren: Oh, yes, yes!
Bethany (hyper): I can force myself to be sober right now. Pretend to be a police officer, I can do it.
Amanda: Hallucinate one.
Mrs. Magee: Do not molest my podium
Spencer: Oh. Too bad.
Robert: You made me wear the hat!
Amanda: You know you look good in it.
Robert: Well... yeah, but you made me wear it.
SENIOR TRIP
SENIOR TRIP
Wait, Indiana Jones? Isn’t that the log ride where you go through the safari? –Kathy Kuzni
(To Jenny) Your hair is a hazard to wildlife! –Christine Chia
Let’s go to the penguins and sit, it’s better than sitting here and watching men. –Robert Meninga
Yeah, but you can sit and walk. –Kathy Kuzni
I smell like bad breath and I really wanna color. –Kathy Kuzni
I’m the Klu Dux Klan. –Kathy Kuzni
I threw a paper shredder and it fought back. –Bethany Mueller
Sleep is Stalin life. –Nick Chavez
There were three hands. I picked the middle one. When you’re drunk, you’re supposed to pick the middle one. –Bethany Mueller
I’d be a good lady. –Christine Chia
She’s forming your nipples. –Nick Chavez (Making a sand-person)
Michael Fong has a seductive look? –Bethany Mueller
Except “gnome” starts with a “k”. –Chelsea Price
Hey, these are great seats- do we get oxygen with these? –Random guy with Maryland hat sitting in front of RCS’s row at Padres game
If you don’t think about it as poo, it smells like sparkling cidar! – Brittany
Hi, my name is Helen Keller. I’m blind and mute! –Brittany
Slow and speedy wins the race! –Chelsea Price
Kim and I had a nostril flaring contest. –Brittany Poon
In the words of Seinfeld- sweet, FANCY Moses! –Alison Dunnegan
I just squeeze my head and force it into submission. –Matt Black
I wanna be a teddy bear. –Ryan Campos
This potato pasta tastes like it has a dash of banana in it. –Kathy Kuzni
No, because I’m going to find some random hot guys in Vegas. –Alison Dunnegan